Anti-diagnosis

So, after waiting for nearly eleven months, my husband and I finally got to drive an hour and half to get the results from all the testing our three year old son has endured. This was supposed to be the visit that set us on the path to help our son deal with/excel beyond his various developmental delays. After the lengthy drive from our small city to Milwaukee, an hour and half of freeway driving through intermittent rain/snow, we arrived at the sprawling medical facility and went to the specialized child developmental clinic. There we met with the two specialists who were in charge of diagnosing our son. We talked for nearly an hour as they explained the reasoning behind their conclusions. About half way through it I knew that the diagnosis I expected, that of Autism Spectrum Disorder which is the same diagnosis my two other children with developmental delays have received, would not be forthcoming. The build up was just too great. There were too many "buts" and "howevers" in their little prep talk. However, that did not prepare me for the climax of our lengthy discussion. In the end, after all the tests, all the expense, all the inconvenience.....there is NO diagnosis. Their summation: Ben has global developmental delays....but we already knew that.

We're supposed to come back in a year for Ben to be re-evaluated (we were, at least, assured the process would be quicker the next time through) to see if anything has changed, to see if a clear diagnosis could be made. See, it could be Autism. However, it could also/instead be mental retardation. There is no known causation they can offer us as a clue to what's going on. And they have no proscribed treatment beyond what we're already doing/attempting. Altogether, "disappointed" and "frustrated" don't begin to describe how I feel. I'm left with a great, wide-open sense of WTF!

Perhaps you were expecting something profound. Something useful or insightful when you started reading this post. Sorry to disappoint you. But, maybe given time, I'll be able to learn something from this and then I'll gladly share it with you. For now this all I can offer. I hope you understand. I sure as hell don't!